I like this review, I like all of the reviews about my book... especially when the tags are TOBACCO and SEX!
Well, it is perfect although I liked to write High-quality Literature.
There’s a monster even more dangerous than Lorena Bobbit with a pair of scissors: an angry Spanish socialist. In fact, I hate politics: promises and promises and, after all the promises, just smoke (and they continue saying “Smoke Kills” and other slogans when they must say, darkness there and nothing more, just “Please, don’t vote us, we are going to stole you”). The other day I was speaking with one of them and (if you don’t know I will tell you right now: my wife is a teacher) he said, no doubts about it:
Must I say
the famous phrase ‘I said it before’? Barcelona won again but there’s another
issue that I want to share with all the audience (I know ‘all the audience’
means a lost man with a coconut and an empty bottle of whiskey): I won money! I
am proud to announce I’ve never worked for money, the only money I won came from the aristocratic manner of betting.
Anyway, because I am as poor as the sailor’s rat, I just could bet 10€, but I
won 210. Don’t you think it’s funny? I was right with the result and… I won! I
know this is not the wiser text you will ever read, but it is the best text I
can write today because I am very happy for this matter. Maybe I can write
tomorrow about Schopenhauer or another ugly philosopher but, today, I am
planning my future as a professional and successfully gambler. Do you really
think I can do? Maybe I must continue writing books, maybe not, but next
weekend I will bet again. As Mr Paul Newman said, the flavor of the money that
you win gambling it’s very better than the saved. Wise man, nice movie.
I must study now. Possibilities, players and numbers,
my new future as a rich man begins now.
P.S: Of course, all of this is a joke, I am going to
write right now, not so excited, not so funny, not so sweet… what a shiii…!
Since I changed the template in this blog I’ve been detecting that the advertisements are laughing of me: need help with alcohol? Of course not, I used to answer, I can drink the whole bottle, I am a Spanish gentleman! Anyway, today is a great day, another match between Madrid and Barça is coming up (see, Isabel, I`m even using phrasal verbs, like a real big boy!). I will say what I am thinking about: Barcelona is going to win again. You may argue that I am a Barça fan and the tobacco blocks my brain, but I have a most powerful reason to think that: if Real Madrid wins, league is over. Will the bosses of the league allow this? I don’t think so but as the Spartans said: this is Spain.
Good luck for all and thanks for read these words from this stupid novelist. See you later (if you think I will come back with a terrible hangover you are true, please forgive me, god!). Bye.
Have you ever known a handsome writer? Nooooo (you will answer), all of them are terribly ugly, poorly dressed; sometimes unshaven, and some others without a teeth (see Cortazar or Eco if you have any doubt). Have you ever heard about a polite writer? Of course, no (neither me). They have bad temper, they behave eccentric and the list of drunkards would be interminable (recently, Saramago has said he is abstemious: well, every rule has one exception, but no more than one). Nevertheless, the majority of them have had no problems with the opposite sex and on the contrary, women have raffled their company (the same with authoresses and their relationship with men). Read more: http://yareah.com/?p=234